Living loved begins with you…

Found a book  it is  called Practicing the Presence of People by Mike Mason.  This is just an excerpt from one little chapter.  Its wonderful let it soak in.

Loving Yourself
….Isn’t it true that the way to know myself is not to look in the mirror, but to love someone? Why then a chapter on loving myself?
Because your self, redeemed in Christ, is what you love with. (I love that line)
The self is the tool with which you practice the presence of others. If you are not good at being yourself, you won’t be good at letting others be who they are.
Consider Jesus’ command, “Love your neighbor as yourself.” The commands of Jesus are not like the commands of a general to his army; they are not like human commands at all. Rather, Jesus’ commands are plain statements of truth. A light goes on and you see the truth of the thing, and then you begin to do it as naturally as breathing. If you do not first see the truth, you will never obey the command. You cannot.
Jesus’ second great commandment implies that we will love others only to the extent that we love ourselves. The command might be better understood by putting the words “You will” in front of it: “You will love your neighbor as yourself”. That is, the feelings you have toward yourself will inevitable be projected upon others. If you do not love yourself, you will not love your neighbor. If you are not real to yourself, no one else will be real to you either. This is not a command as we normally think of commands; rather, it is the way things are. It is a natural law. You will not and cannot treat others any better than you treat yourself. Why would you?
It is a monstrous lie to think that I can be anything to others that I am not to myself. If I am not gentle with myself, I will not be gentle with others. If I am not generous to myself, neither will I give to anyone else. If I am plagued with guilt, be it ever so subltly, then I will be  harsh and judgmental with others. Moreover everyone around me will be aware of my critical nature, while I myself will be the last to know.
To the servant who put his talent to good use and earned ten more, the Master said, “Because you have been trustworthy in a very small matter, take charge of ten cities: (Luke 1:17). The first small matter we must look to is ourselves. Yet how many people ever learn to take goood care of this one poor, small thing? We want to help and heal the whole world, but we will not start with ourselves.
How can we know if we love ourselves? what is the sign? Its a simple: We’ll have lives that are characterized by being warm and full inside, happy and thankful.
WHAT? Who ever heard of such foolishness! Warm and happy—-in a world like this? Nonsense?
Yes, the extremity of our reaction gives us away. The degree of our shock will register how thoroughly we have bought the lie that it is not okay to look after ourselves. Far from feeling warm and content and full of gratitude, we spend our days being stressed, insecure, angry, sullen, or numb with genteel denial. And in this condition we continue to tell ourselves that we can work, love, be productive, smile, help others, make a difference. But its’s all a sickening lie.
The way to make a difference in this world is to become what everyone else is not: happy and full of life. It’s not enough just to point the way; we get to become the way, as Jesus was. He made it possible for us to have “the full measure of {His} joy” within us ( John 17:13). Why aren’t we filling up our tanks? Is it because we won’t admit we are empty? Are we so proud and neurotic that we cannot even believe that joy—real joy, irrepressibly bubbbling over —-is deservedly ours? Shutting ourselves off from this fullness, we have nothing to share with anyone else. Moreover, if we’re not filliing up with joy ourselves, it’s guaranteed we’re taking it from others. We are robbing each other blind.

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